You would think that terms such as gaslighting, stonewalling, ghosting, hoovering, grandiose, manipulation, victim playing, blame shifting and deflecting would be attributes of a narcissistic person, yet these are tactics used by our government on the citizens it is supposed to represent.
In a democracy, the government serves the people not the interests of big business, friends with fat pockets or heavy influence. But does this hold for Malta?
And this is where we start exploring the terms usually attributable to narcissistic persons.
In less than three years, the government has been found guilty twice over for the unjustified, brutal and untimely deaths of two of its citizens – Daphne Caruana Galizia and Jean Paul Sofia. Non-coincidentally, in both cases, the government offered fierce and unrelenting resistance against the opening of public inquests, knowing too well that many of its members or friends would be caught with their pants down. In the process, it ghosted members of the victims’ families, tried to shift the blame on them, gaslighted them, and stonewalled their calls for justice. The government only caved in due to mounting public pressure and outcry, only to try and bully the board members whilst they were performing their duty and to attack their conclusions as an aftermath.
The government uses these same tactics with journalists. It shifts the blame on them, accuses them of having ulterior agendas, tries to deflect anger caused by regular revelations of corruption and scandals by finding scapegoats, avoids them like the plague and becomes receptive towards them only when convenient.
Members of government are huge fans of grandiose. They spend millions on film festivals, tens of millions on film sponsorships. They like to brush shoulders with famous actors and film makers. It makes them feel important. They love using bombastic vocabulary – it makes them feel highly intelligent and sophisticated. But once you look beyond the charade, all you get is empty words and huge public expenditure at the citizen’s expense.
When things become too hot for government to handle, and public dissent gets too loud, hoovering and love bombing do the trick. Cheques start hitting our letter boxes, apologies abound, and promises for better behaviour spring up on all news portals. Sweet talking and financial rewards set the mood for romance and second chances.
So when you think about it, the people are really and truly being manipulated by an abusive government.
And it takes plenty of hard work to outsmart someone as abusive as a narcissist. The biggest step towards redemption though, is acknowledging the abuse.